What is this madness??!?!

NAME CHANGE?!?!

I could sit here and try to claim that this name change is a clever reference to the fact that we will shortly be welcoming in 2011. New year, new start, etc...However, I would be lying. I just haven't liked the name since about the second day I got the blog and I changed it because I prefer the new one :)

I will never change it again! Promise.

2010 has been an absolutely insane year for me. Definitely the best year I've ever had - I won't go as far as to say I have "loved every second" because I'd be lying, but I have suddenly had abundantly more good times than bad. Life has been crazy but I have met the best friends I have ever ever had this year.

My New Year Resolutions consist of:

1. Stop biting my nails. This tends to be a reoccuring theme in my new years resolutions...
2. Work harder at school in order to actually pass my A-Levels. This shall commence as soon as I have actually looked at the General Studies curriculum.
3. Smile more. Why not?

I have two more but I shall keep them to myself ;)

New year, new start? I'm not gonna fool myself into thinking that everything will be fine as soon as the clock chimes in 2011. Much, in fact almost everything, will remain the same. But that's OK, because if my 2011 is half as lovely as my 2010, we'll be onto a winner...:D
Because I am a nerd, I am welcoming in 2011 in true nerd styley. I am having a few friends over and we are going to party like it's 2012 nerdy styley, with beaucoup de board-games, geeky dancing, photographs and pizza. Just add muchos laughter.

Muchos love for 2011!

God bless,
Anna :)

So, I am sat on the sofa with Sister Act playing in the background at least 4lbs heavier than two days ago, next to a very sleepy Gran and a Christmas tree stripped of all it's chocolates. All are signs that Christmas is coming to a close.

I am in Worthing at my cousins house. Lack of beds means me and my brothers are sharing a travelodge room. This is an interesting experience which has forced the three of us to actually communicate for the first time in about 4 years. Happily, I have discovered my brothers to be amusing and agreeable roommates :-D

This year my Christmas consisted of lemon meringue pie, nut roast (a far superior vegetarian alternative to turkey), West Side Story, surprise presents, too much telly and an awful lot of chocolate. Quality :-)

I have somehow managed to get through the entirety of Christmas and Boxing Day without feeling remotely festive - it hasn't really hit me that's it's actually Christmas. Despite all the seasonal adverts, the presents, the Christmas telly, the food and the family, I just don't feel very festive...

Don't get me wrong, I love Christmas. Just not feeling it. Loving the great TV and that it is acceptable to eat as much trifle as it is possible. 

Can't forget the board games, too. Christmas just wouldn't be what it is with out the annual ridiculously long game of monopoly. Incidentally, I got hotels on the best set in yesterday, BOOM. We have also played Scoop, a surprisingly fun game about newspapers that I am shockingly bad at. I'm also pretty immense at charades - I do a fabulous Lion King impression.

Happy Christmas!
God bless,
Much love, Anna :)

It's nearly Christmas! (So there's a giant conifer tree in town?)

It is, if you hadn't gathered by the appearance of the Santa's Grotto in town, or the fact that it is 22nd December, it's nearly Christmas!

First, I must channel my frustration at that same Santa's Grotto through the medium of a neatly structured paragraph. It is, it must be said, the ugliest I have ever seen erected in a town centre. It's not even a conifer tree (which, for the record, are the more unattractive trees possibly ever invented by God), it's a fake conifer tree. Can you get any worse? Even the star on top is crappy and mishapen and not even very bright. The whole grotto - and the fact that it costs £4.50 to get inside - is just the appitany of crap.

Aside from this, I do rather appreciate the appearance of Christmas trees and decorations left right and centre. The road I live on is rather famed  for it's flamboyant light display and, sure enough, this year is no exception. On the 1st December, the lights pop up on the trees and houses. Some are very OTT, but some do manage to get the balance between sublime and ridiculous right.

One thing that always makes me feel decidedly more Christmassy is Christmas films. 'The Holiday', for example, 'Elf' and 'The Grinch'. None are groundbreaking examples of movies but they all possess the feel-good factor, and warm your heart ever so slightly. Speaking of films, the Harry Potter I've been watching has just finished :(

Harry Potter also makes me feel Christmassy, because it also has Christmas somewhere in it, as it runs over the course of a year. I feel like makes it qualifiable (is that a word?).

Very soon, we shall be making our annual drive down to Worthing (that's in Sussex for the uneducated, which is kind of near London for the even stupider ;) to see our cousins. We always gather for Christmas Day and it is always something I look forward to immensely. My youngest cousin is only 2 weeks younger than me, but in a different school year. I know the divide has to happen at one point, but it has always been a source of great amusement to me that, despite technically not even being a month older than Stevie, I can mock him for immaturity. My other cousins are quite a bit older than me - one is living in America, one is a dancer like me, one does something with computers (I think...). All are gathering in Worthing for Christmas. That's if the snow holds out. At the moment there is 50/50 we won't even make it to Worthing because of the weather. This would, naturally, suck. I love my cousins and my aunties and uncles very much and I've never spent a Christmas (that I can remember) without them. Here's hoping the weather improves!

Speaking of snow, I think I am going to kill the person who invented black ice. It shall be the death of me.

Also, why are pantomimes Christmassy? I've always found them rather annoying, but I put up with them because they seem to be an embedded part of my family's Christmas traditions.

God bless, and I hope you have a lovely Christmas - and remember why Christmas even happens!
Love, Anna :)

Splurdge.

I have done/am doing very little today. Well no - technically I've done loads, just not anything particuarly productive or useful. I've watched 3 movies, read the last half of my book, eaten an over-indulgent amount of houmous, a fried egg sandwich, drawn a giant picture, and lolled on the sofa in my pyjamas and dressing gown. A growing disinterest in Harry Potters predicaments combined with the knowledge that I haven't blocked since last Wednesday has lead me onto Blogspot.

"You never know what you've got till it's gone"
Hhmmmmmm cheesy right? Yes, it is. But it's also somewhat sadly true. For example, my best friend Rae is on holiday in South Africa, whilst my other best friend Gilly is bedridden with flu. I have had fun with other friends, but I truly did not realize how much I enjoyed and needed their company until they're gone! Having people that understand my need to go see the Narnia film, cheer at my suggestion to make jam donut muffins, and know exactly what I mean when I glance at them.

People often take small things like that for granted, not realizing how much they rely on something until it's not there to rely upon. 

I'm afraid there's not all that much splurdge in my brain today. Yesterday my youthgroup said goodbye to it's leader and to mark the occasion we had a curry. I love Korma. My friend Andy gave me a lot of stick for not being "adventurous". My opinion on it is this, though - I have tried other curries, and korma is the best! Why be adventurous when you can just eat the best curry there is?! It was a lovely evening of catching up with old friends who have disappeared off to uni. Sadness of Ben's leaving mixed with happiness of seeing friends and catching up. It's sad, but sometimes it's time to move on. 

Well, that's my life today :-D

God bless, and Merry Christmas!
Love, Anna :)  

Carpe Diem?

One of the biggest flaws of humanity is our "I'll do it tomorrow" mindset. We generally agree that if something needs doing, particuarly somethig scary or involving effort, it can be done in the near future.

The problem is that, as a race, our instinct for comfort and safety at this exact moment is so much stronger than our idea that by acting, doing something that us uncomfortable NOW, something may good happen in the future. Does that make any sense at all? Not really. What I mean is...hmm, example time I think...

So many times have I seen two people that blatantly fancy each other stall and start and flirt for absolutely ages withot either one having the balls to say to the other "I fancy you". Why? Because both are scared of rejection, scared of humiliation. Both like being comfortable and safe now than putting themselves out there, making themselves vulnerable in order for something good to potentially happen.

When we tell someone we like them, admit a secret, do something we're scared about, we essentially throw ourselves out there. Take a risk. Make ourselves vulnerable and open to being hurt. Our instinct to avoid that is almost to strong. Often I find that it is best to live by the attitude that there won't necessarily be a tomorrow, that this moment right now is only one you'll ever get. Sounds cheesy I know. But consider this: that thing that you need to do may be scary, may make you a target, but what have you really got to lose? Your pride may be torn slightly, perhaps your heart even scratched. But you'll recover! And who knows, taking that risk might be the best decision you've ever made...

God bless
Love, Anna :) 

I am hyperactive OK!

I am, by nature, what can only be described as a little bit hyperactive. Even when my body calms down for a moment, my mind is almost constantly whirling. This, whilst in some ways being a gift, can also be rather potentially problematic sometimes.

I like to think, perhaps somewhat pretentiously, that people find my manic energy endearing, as opposed to annoying. Certainly, it is an inescapable part of who I was made to be. All too often, however, I find I become a little too bouncey and loud for some people's personal enjoyment. This is an aspect of my character I am learning to keep under control, whilst still trying to 'be who I am', as it were.

A side effect of being born with an unholy amount of energy both in body and mind seems to be overthinking. Whilst I avoid thinking about important things like my future, and surprisingy unbothered by things I know I can't affect (like the evolution debate - I've never had a opinion because it just doesn't seem important to me!), I am very good at analysing stupid things that nobody else notices. Perhaps this is why I am so suited to blogging, it gives me the chance to order my manically changeable and overly analytical thoughts. For things like why people are the way they are, and nature vs nutre and why people (often males -.-) do stuff, I seem to have endless brain power and brain time. There is always something buzzing in my brain.

I rarely stop - all through the week I am in constant GO form.  As a result of this, I have developed an interesting problem. When sat down for over 10 minutes, particularly if I have got nothing or something very dull to do, I constantly fall asleep. It's a habit that has put me on the bad side of more than one teacher ("I'm sorry Anna, am I BORING you?")  Because of it, I tend to have two modes in lessons - desperately (and on occasions not so desperately) trying to stay awake, or so talkative that it is difficult to quiet me.

Over the last few months, I have tried and tested many methods of keeping myself awake.
1. Going to bed earlier. This failed because I have too much to do to go to bed earlier, and generally didn't make much of a difference.
2. Getting up later. This seemed to make it worse and me late.
3. Keeping something cold near to shove against my cheek if I started drifting off. This worked, but I very quickly became immune to it and able to fall asleep with ice on my cheek.
4. Pinching myself. I have really short nails, so this was a bit of a non-starter.
5. Texting someone. This may sound stupid, but it was certainly the best of the 5. Whenever my phone vibrated I felt obliged to look at the screen. For some reason, screens keep me awake so it was brilliant! (Side-effects include not paying attention in class...)

God bless
Love, Anna :)

Is uncritical even a word?!

So I had an interesting day today. I normally have a knack for getting away with stuff. Like texting in class, (or in my case playing bloons because no-one will text me), or talking a lot without teachers noticing it's me. Not today though. My french teacher is a bit hormonal. It is usually pretty obvious when teachers are about to rant on you. This one sat quietly in her chair for the best part of 7 minutes before exploding into tiny shards all over us while we sat there meekly trying not to look at each other because it felt like an inappropriate time for laughter...

I also had a scarf-whipping war with my friend Luke. And Brogan. Although I don't think Brogan was really an official member of this war, he just in the way of a lot of scarf-whipping. Unfortunately, my drama teacher wandered in to me on my back yelling something along the lines of "STOP WHIPPING ME." and trying to grab this constantly descending whipping scarf which Luke was whipping. As you can probably predict, he looked more than a little bemused...

It is a source of great pain to me that I study Critical Thinking. It is a source of even greater pain to me that I choose to study it. Not for any particular reason, just because apparently I think extra a-levels are fun. Critical Thinking seems very uncritical to me. It's about arguments. I have managed to win a whole load of arguments without the aid of credibility, plausibility and R.A.V.E.N, you just insist you're right until the other person can't be bothered anymore. I spent the majority of critical thinking drawing a very detailed turd on my friends hand, even including flies and smell-lines.

I then walked up to dancing (TWO HOURS IN THE SNOW :) and preceded to munch on a Wispa while reading an article about a woman who bought a baby on Facebook. (I think the stuff I read in Take a Break warrants it's own blogpost...watch this space!) I then realised I had become so absorbed in the creepy baby facebook story that I was 5 minutes late for dancing...We then did pointe at Majors at my feet died...this is how exciting my life is! :

I then got annoyed at facebook because IT IS SO FULL OF NUMBER STATUSES. You know that thing where you inbox someone a number (when did inbox become a verb?! I love english :D) and they write an anonymous status about you. Issue is, the person it's about comments on it like "aawwww love you too babes". I yearn for the day when someone is actually honest about hating someone. "77 - YOU'RE A TWAT LEAVE ME ALONE." This may cause friction but it would be funny.

God bless :)
Love, Anna

Appearance Is Important?

There is something very pretentious, about humanity's obsession with appearance. None of our primate or jungle cousins find the need to disguise their true appearance as we do. Media, and if we're honest ourselves, are absorbed with appearances.

Whether it's the simple fact that One Direction remain in XFactor despite clearly being mediocre singers, because they are ridiculously attractive. Or the fact that often the prettier out of the two best candidates gets the job...too frequently in out world is appearance put above other credentials.

Now, whether we like it or not, admit it or not, physical appearances matter in relationships. It goes without saying that you couldn't be with someone who you weren't attracted to...but this has been blown out of proportion by magazines and media that tell you can only be loved if you're beautiful. It really is true that beauty in the eye of the beholder, and menand my friends almost consistently disagree on who is fit and who is not. You can certainly start to become more attracted to somebodys physical appearance if you start to like their personality.

Another obsession I am yet to fathom is make up. Don't get me wrong, I still wear it. But lately I have been wondering what it is about effectively paintin your face that makes you more attractive. I suppose it adds interest and colour and covers up spots, but who even thought of it in the first place? It makes me almost sad to think that somebody was so unhappy with the way they looked that they felt the need to invent something to cover it up.

How does something become fashionable and how is fashion so addictive? Who's job is to make a a ripped pair of jeans the must-have for Christmas? For example, upon seeing a pair of worker boots in River Island about 2 years ago, I remarked
"eerrrrrrrr they're so weird who would wear them!" Now, I think they look immense and amxsavingnup for a pair myself. The cleverness of the fashion industry is that they manipulate and persuade you that certain items or clothes look good, eventhough if you were the only one wearing it you'd look a bit silly.

Funny how quickly we can change our minds.

God bless,
Love, Anna :)

I will never understand boys!

Boy vs. Girls.

Hmmmmmmm.

Why is it that it is almost impossible for the male species to understand the females, and vice versa?

There seems to be something embedded in the genes of males and females that makes them so different! Boys, for instance, are much happier (when they're younger generally) to have a bigger group of friends without a singular 'best friend', whilst little girls normally prefer to have the security of a 'best friend' and are more easily upset by friendship rows.

Some of it must be nature. Boys are often told, from an early age, that it is not manly to cry or show emotion. And certainly as they get older, boys seems to be much better at hiding emotion than girls. Whether this is simply because of these message, or there is something in their genes that makes them less emotionless. You certainly wouldn't see many guys posting statuses like "Why I am always left behind? :/ <3". They are (almost always) less comfortable with emotion than girls are.

In general, guys are expected to 'make the first move' with a relationship. Frequently, I have had a conversation with one of girl friends about how annoying it is that whatshisname hasn't asked her out yet. I can't help wondering why this is, but for some reason it seems weird to us to have a girl asking a guy out. Maybe it relates to the dominance thing. I suppose guys are supposed to be more powerful or strong than girls, and perhaps emotion is a sign of weakness however.

Of course, emotion sometimes reveals itself in men in the form of flirtiness. Again, I have, many a time, had to comfort a friend after she discovers a guy is, in fact, going out with someone else "after texting all the time for ages!". Guys are flirts, but then again so are a lot of girls. I suppose it's just easier for a guy to hurt a girl by flirting than it is the other way around. I am also yet to understand the obsession with wearing low trousers. It doesn't make you a badman, and you just look like you might be getting a chilly bum. Similar applies with untied shoelaces - it makes no difference and untied you'll probably just fall over and look like an absolute poose...

I am also yet to comprehend the reasoning behind excessive hair gel. Why fabricate dandruff?!

I'm not saying girls are blameless! I admit that our fluctuating emotions can be very difficult for guys to fathom. The truth is that none of us actually know what we want from you, men, sorry. (Except that it's gross when you spit on the road. We're sure about that.) I have before been on the recieving end of a phonecall featuring a very confused male ranting about how she said she liked him and now she's not sure and it's so frustrating!

Girls often too quickly get caught up in the emotion of a relationship. Most girls have lots of insecurities, which they cover up by clinging to a guy. When this guy disappears, it makes them feel rubbish because their security blanket is gone. This is my experience anyway. My advice for anyone (and I speak from experience) is that you have to be secure about yourself before getting into a relationship...otherwise all your security comes from that person and if they disappear you end up feeling pooey about yourself.

I could probably talk about my confusion about males for another 628 paragraphs, but I won't.

God bless,
Love, Anna :)

As It Seems?

I sometimes wonder if anyone is actually truly themselves. It was the snow that got me wondering about this, I suppose. It disguises everything - distinctly shaped objects become anonymous blurs under the weight of this white blanket. It's beautiful, yes. But it's not revealing, or real. Snow covers up the scratches and imperfections. Just like the façade a lot of people put on.

People often say they don't like how someone has 'changed'. I have always found this an inadequate reason not to like someone because people do change. They grow up, make new friends, find themselves and who they’re most comfortable being. Yes, sometimes this means leaving others behind. But that’s how life goes. Aside from birth and death, the only other inevitable thing in life is change.

True, when someone overnight turns on their old friends and starts acting differently it can be painful. People get hurt, people get angry but ultimately, you have to accept that it’s their life. And let them do with it what they will.

The media is full of messages such telling us to ‘be true to ourselves’ and ‘be who we are’. I often wonder what the world would be like if people actually did this. If everybody always said what they were thinking, and ‘were who they are’ all the time, I’m convinced that within one day many things would get said that would hurt people, fights would break out and, whilst some friendships – the honest kind, the kind of friendships where there are no lies – would flourish, many others would rapidly deteriorate. Society contradicts itself. At the same time as telling us to be true to ourselves, it also silently conditions us to behave in a certain way, at a certain time.

Take an example 3-year-old boy, and let’s call him Oliver. In the middle of a quiet and solemn church service, Oliver will cry, scream and laugh to his heart’s content. Does he care that everyone else is silent? No. Is he even aware that he is the only one behaving as such? Of course! Oliver hasn’t been conditioned by the rules and conducts of society as yet. Oliver responds to what he feels, with no regard of his appearance to other people. The same cannot be said of teenagers and adults. We learn as we grow up that different people require different levels of politeness, different kinds of language, different actions. Essentially, we each put on a different façade for every different kind of people.

I, for instance, would never act in the same way around my parents as I do around my best friends. However, I would never argue with my best friends or insult them the way I do my brothers. If I met someone famous or whom I admired, I wouldn’t start a conversation beginning “Would you rather poo through your mouth or eat through your bum?” as I would with some of my closer friends. And although I’m convinced that my God already knows me back to front, it’s taken a long time for me to learn to pray and be open with him like I am with friends. I’m sure it’s similar for you too.

So the question I’m interested in is this. If we conjure up a different front for ourselves with different kinds of people, then which façade is actually the real you?

Just something to ponder over.

God bless,

Love, Anna :)

P.S: I have started checking my blogposts through before I post them, albeit very briefly. There should hopefully be slightly less words missed out and spelling mistakes than before ;)

Feeling Inspired...and Snow.

Oh my little bloggees! I am so sorry for my unexcusable absence from blogging. The reasons for my absence are numerous and listing them seems unnecessary, but I think it suffices to say that poor time management and lack of inspiration are the culprits.


Well, lack of inspiration in one sense. Normally, I am brimming with ideas for blogs, to the extent where I have to force myself to stop writing so it isn't a million paragraphs long! However, despite this flow of creative at blog writing, ordinarily I am the world's worst song-writer. I sit done at a piano and not stroke of inspiration I can turn into a song ever hits me. I have been experiencing a slight role-reversal as far as blogging and song-writing go in the past week, however. I sit at the computer keyboard, all prepped to write a nice blog, to find I don't have enough to say. Sitting at the piano keyboard, however, music seems to flow out of me like errr, milk flows out a cow. I have composed 7 songs in the past week alone! I am trying to balance the balance so neither my song-writing creative or my blogging abilities are affected by this change of dynamic.
Well, on with the, rather inevitable I may add, subject of this blog....
Snow has a tendency to produce diverse reactions in people. On commencement of snow, the facebook statuses seem to take two directions. Either we have the haters, who like to tell snow to go away because they can't be bothered with it and it's just too cold. Or the excitable six-year-olds at heart are revealed in their abundance, with many rather optimistic announcements of how school will probably be closed tomorrow and many cheery stories of how much fun sledging was.


Up until last year, I always leaned towards the second, developing a characteristic tendency to do an excitable little dance with a woke up on a freshly snowy morning. And indeed, the dance revealed itself again this Saturday when I woke up to 3 texts informing me of the weather conditions.


This year, however, I have experienced a slight change of heart. I'm not sure whether it's because I'm showing my age (which would be worrying as I am only 16...) or because I'm just a bit grouchy suddenly. I have started to very much dislike the cold that all too inevitably comes with the snow. In my opinion, being cold is the worst feeling apart from being hurt. A lack of decent gloves, coupled with a dislike of hat hair means Anna gets very cold walking to school these days.


For me, the biggest excitement of snow is the possibility that I might get snowed in somewhere. This, of course, has never actually happened but it's always nice to fantasise. Sledging fun too.


Homework calls, with a loud and un-shutupable voice.


I will do another more serious blog soon.


God bless
Love, Anna :)

dance like no-one's watching...?

I love dancing. It is the most beautiful art form because it's something you express with your body, your face, everything. It can be so very personal, and, when it comes from the heart, it has the power to deeply move and really affect.

I feel like dancing has a bit of a bad press. Music videos with talented dancers doing nothing but thrusting and grinding make me wonder how such a vivid art form has been taken and transformed so dramatically. Dancing is supposed to be something that comes from inside, no matter what the steps. It bugs me that some people's only experience of dancing comes from stuff like this.

I'd like to take this oppurtunity a few myths about my favourite pasttime...

1. Dancing is not a sport.Dancing is insane exercise! Anyone that does it would agree with me. It's as much a sport as ice-skating or figure-skating. Anyone who says otherwise should try it! ;)

2. Dancing is for girls and guys that dance must be gay.

Ppppffffffffffttt. Males dancers exist in their abundance, and it is an incredibly narrow-minded stereotype to even consider them gay. They are usually much more fit and athletic than other guys. Street dance is becoming increasingly popular, and there are many popular male street dancers like George Sampson and Diversity. But this doesn't mean that male ballet or contemporary dancers should be stereotyped or labelled. I think its because dancing is such an expressive art form and there is this unwritten law in society that men shouldn't show too much emotion. Dancing requires immense strength, a quality more associated with men than with woman.

3. Every dancer is insanely flexible effortlessly.

True, they are the occasional few who can drop into splits from the age of 3. These are the severe minority however and I am (to my dismay) not one of them. Most dancers have to work immensely hard not only to gain a level of suppleness, but also to maintain. Serious dancers stretch daily, and often push their bodies to limits not reached in other sports. Flexibility in dancing is also generally a bonus rather a requirement.

If you're still reading now, it's either because you already liked dancing or I've done something in this blog to inform you. I adore dancing - when done well it is lyrical, expressive, and I use to express emotions I can't always put into words.

God bless,

Love, Anna :)

Cold feet, corn on the cob, tea without milk and not doing homework....

I am sat here typing this wondering whether getting up and braving the freezing cold tiles of the kitchen in order to collect socks or staying here slowly but surely allowing my feet to fall off from cold is the best option. As it stands I am probably just going to stay here with cold feet because my room is too far north (or south, maybe neither...I have no compass) to bother venturing to. Having cold feet is the worst, it makes the rest of you cold :( I have, however, just discovered a working radiator to my right which I have now turned up to full and on which my feet are balanced at perfect foot resting distance and my tootsies (Why are toes nicknamed tootsies? It's such a ridiculous word.) are happily warming themselves with glee :D on with the blog it seems....

As many people who know me know, my food tastes are a little...shall we say, unusual? I dislike any form of meat, generally discarding it as stringy, tasteless, chewy, leaves a nasty aftertaste, fatty...) and absolutely adore ketchup. I would pretty much do anything for a packet of hula-hoops, hell, a single hula hoop, a cup of tea, a cheestring or a corn on the cob. But without a doubt, my favourite food is houmous.

I will confess, houmous is my downfall, my weakness. I absolutely adore the stuff. I have become a bit of a houmous-related legend at my school, as far as dip-related legends go. Every break time, without fail, I whip out my carrot, cucumber, pepper and bread sticks and my tub of houmous. I literally do not feel that one could ever have enough houmous. I could probably start a blog advertising it and find something new to write about everyday. It's versatile, healthy, ridiculously tasty, creamy without being fatty, it goes with everything, have you tried houmous on bread? Its the new peanut-butter! As you have probably gathered, I am addicted in a slightly (perhaps...) worrying way to a dip that I will admit looks quite a lot like baby sick.
My other weird food fetish is tea without milk. At least I am told it is weird. It started when we thought I had a milk allergy (I didn't, that is a whooolle other story.). I am a bit of a self-confessed tea addict, I drink at least 5 cups a day. Rather than giving it up or having it with soya milk (which, lets face it, is revolting) I started having it without milk. OK, so it tastes a bit weirder but I like it :(

I should probably get back to my homework now...

God bless
Love, Anna :)

Part Of Me.

I'll admit, I am cheating today slightly. I shall in fact be giving you, instead of a proper blog, the lyrics to my new song. Hopefully you will like them and even more hopefully they will make you think...
The song is the story of someone approching the cross and seeing in all it's beauty, power, brokenness and strength.

I see you there hanging on that cross
And the sun sets behind
Your silouette, black against the sky
is the most beautiful sight.

Part of me will forever be
Kneeling at the cros where you died
How could I look on that inifinite beauty
And not want to be changed inside?
Lord have my pride, my pride, my pride.

As I approach, I see your face
And I know it was for me.
Broken, battered, bleeding, bruised...
All so I could be free.

So part of me will forever be,
Kneeling at this cross where you died.
How could I look on these agonizing wounds
And not need to be changed inside?
Lord have my pride, my pride, my pride.

And there is nothing I could ever do or say
So I'll just fall at your feet.
Knowing I will ever be changed,
Because of what you've done for me!

God, part of me will forever be,
Kneeling at this cross where you died.
How could I look on this selfless act of mercy
Without a need to be changed side?
Lord, kill my pride, my pride, my pride.
We will not forget what you've done for us,
We will not forget what you've done for us,
We cannot forget what you've done for us, Jesus!

So part of me will forever be,
Fallen at this cross where you died.
I have looked on your unimaginable glory,
And been changed inside.
Lord, you are mine.

I shall learn to play it well enough to record and put on YouTube fairly soon :-) By the way, at the moment it's called 'Part Of Me' which I'm not happy with as a title, any suggestions?? Comment if you can (which means SUBSCRIBE ;) or Facebook me :-)

God bless,
Love, Anna :)

LOL?

I have developed a, slightly embarrassing I will admit, habit lately. I constantly say LOL in spoken conversation. It is a habit that has caused many of my friends to, many a time, be like "Anna, you're not even laughing why are you saying LOL?!". To all the the non-converted, purely typers of LOL, I would just like to justify my reasoning.

When you're tired, after or during a long day of meandering and pointless lessons, traipsing up and down the corridors and classrooms with your bag weighing you down and someone takes you by surprise with an amusingly inappropriate or otherwise comment, often it is simply easier to say LOL, rather than outwardly laughing. You know you are laughing on the inside.

There is also that unforgettably sarcastic use of the word LOL. Like when someone tells a long, pointless and unfunny story and you don't want to offend them as such by not laughing, but you can't be bothered to laugh so you just have to whip out that good old fall-back "LOL". This use of LOL always applies to vaguely funny jokes that do not warrant the effort of a full laugh.

And besides, sometimes when I say "LOL" i am actually LOLing. I hear you LOL haters chorusing: so whats the point in saying LOL? The point, my dears, is for emphasise, as saying LOL puts your laughter at a status than the laughter of those around you. Fo sho.

And this brings me on to another point about the word LOL (yes, there's more...). I have a little niggle about allowing myself to type LOL without the capitals. First off, its technically initials, so if you're not gonna go the whole hog and type "L.O.L." you may as well at least be vaguely grammatical and type the capitals. Second off, it just looks stupid in lower case. Third off (is that a phrase?), the voice in your head shouts when it reads the capitals, thereby making your laughter stand out above the crowd.

I think you should start saying LOL in your general laughter, it makes everything a little more exciting and varied.

God bless,
Love, Anna :)

Chip Wednesday.

(<-- The picture is half way through Chip Wednesday, therefore we ate twice this amount :)

i'm sure it is widely accepted that Wednesday is the pooiest day of the week. it's just in the most awkward place and you're always tired and the weekend is miles away and lets just face, Wednesday is nobody's favourite day. It spelling doesn't even make sense! I have said already said "Wed - nes - day" in my head about 600 times while writing this block and it is becoming hindersome.

so to brighten up our Wednesdays, at dancing we have Chip Wednesdays :D Ok, some may argue that having a ridiculous amount of chips every Wednesday defies the point of energetic dancing exercise. we, however, say that chips are tasty and they relief the stress of teachers that are stressed and therefore MEAN :

today, we got through 17 sachets of ketchup. This may seem excessive I hear you cry. and perhaps it's true, we did empty the ketchup but for 2 sachets. however, 6 hungry dancers that like ketchup = 17 sachets, apparently. how do you like your chips?? It has to be confessed I'm a bit of a ketchup junkie. i adore the stuff and have it on everything i am allowed to have it on. im also partial to a liberal sprinkling of salt. if you're a vinegar lover, i probably give you that toffee-nosed (WHAT A WORD!) face in the chipshop when i see you splashing your brown acid everywhere.

i think you should all embrace the chippiness of Wednesday to release the stress and hardships that Wednesday's inevitably bring.

God bless,

Love, Anna :)

PS: i do realise that occasional I use made up words in my blogposts. frankly, they are more fun you can shush.

all you need to do smile?

if there's one thing that life's taught me, it's that this (^) isn't really true. sometimes curling up and crying is the best possible thing you can do for your heart!
happiness is a funny thing. what is actual happiness? is an emotion, a feeling, something which you are one moment and then you're not? or is it a state, something which you remain even when something fleeting poos you off or annoys you? as a general rule, i would say it's not not something which can be found in the sense of searching for it. it tends to be something which creeps up on you when you forget you want to be it.

the last time i can remember thinking "wow i'm actually happy!" was on sunday, which is i guess why i'm writing this blog at all. i had just been prayed for, and had this amazing sense of relief. i went to play just dance on the wii with my friends and somewhere in the midst of insanely camp dancing, losing by like 2 points to a boy and laughing like a loooonn, the thought hit me. whether it hit me so solidly at this moment is debatable. perhaps it was simply in the height of hilariousity and the power of the moment. i had this immense sense of release and comfort and i knew i was loved. by both my god and my friends.

i guess its that feeling of being loved by those you love which i think it true happiness. being loved is a fundamental human need, it links back to nearly all basic emotion, though admittedly not always in an obvious way.

so what is happiness? its a deeply individual thing. for me i suppose it comes down to three things. my happiness within myself, my happiness with others and my happiness with my faith.

happiness within yourself is that inexplicable need to accept ourselves and who we are. having a good self-image is fundamental to your personal happiness. because even if everybody else loves you, you have to like yourself before you can even begin to accept this love. loving yourself is never about change or conformity, but rather about accepting who you are and trying to love the parts you can.

happiness with others is more straightforward. like i said above, everybody has this indescribable yet undeniably present need to be loved. people who feel they are loved by those they love are almost always "happier" with their lot than victims of, for example, unrequited love or people who have bad relations with their loved ones. i suppose everyone needs to have people around them make them happy, and this is a crucial element to anyone's happiness.

happiness with your faith is an element which some may argue doesn't exist at all, but to me it is the most important of 3. whether or not you believe in God, you cannot deny that something is laid in human hearts from the beginning that cries out for bigger answers, and embraces the idea that a being bigger and greater than themselves is not only watching, but guiding you through life. happiness in your faith is essential, i believe, to be truly "happy". speaking from personal experience, i've seen people become desperately unhappy when they feel cut off or away from God, even if all the other supposed 'elements' of happiness are in place. like it or not, God affects happiness.

well this is the end of my first proper blog, i hope it has made you think and that you enjoyed reading it as much as i enjoyed writing it.

God bless,
Love, Anna :)

my first post!

OK folks!

this is my blog, the splurge, thoughts, excitements and general life of a 16-year-old Sheffield girl :)

it will be a mix of anecdotal, on occasions humourous (she says...!) stories and stuff but also my slightly deeper and more serious views on stuff what i think about, and maybe struggle with. sometimes Christian and sometimes not but always from a Christian perspective cos that's just who I am :)

basically this is my way of expressing myself and hopefully you will find it always sometimes informative, occasionally funny, every so often deeply personal, and constantly interesting. hopefully there will be something about it which makes you enjoy and read on!

love, Anna :)